Put it out of your mind. In no time, it will be a forgotten memory.

When someone does something good, applaud! You will make two people happy.

If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive.

We want a story that starts out with an earthquake and works its way up to a climax.

I don't want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their job.

The harder I work, the luckier I get.

A hospital is no place to be sick.

Ninety percent of the art of living consists of getting along with people you cannot stand.

I'm willing to admit that I may not always be right, but I am never wrong.

From success you get a lot of things, but not that great inside thing that love brings you.

If Roosevelt were alive today, he'd turn over in his grave.

I understand Jacqueline Kennedy has redone the White House in eighteenth-century style. Why, then, I'd fit in perfectly.

The man who remains a fool even in advanced age is really a fool, just as the Indra-Varuna fruit does not become sweet no matter how ripe it might become.

The cloud of caring for nothing, which overshadowed him with such a fatal darkness, was very rarely pierced by the light within him.

I don't cook... I don't know how to clean... there's may be a good chance I'm an alcoholic.

If I have to be a monotheist, y'know pick one, I'm picking vodka, it goes well with everything, all occasions.

Video games are ubiquitous now.

Once you start, there is no end to who is to go in and who is to be left out.

Of course people don't want war. Why should a poor slob on a farm want to risk his life in a war when the best thing he can get out of it is to come back to his farm in one piece?

Like a dog, a playwright lives in an eternal present and a play is never closed.

People think that as a celebrity, you have to have this sort of mystique about you, but I'm probably the realest person you'll ever meet.