Political systems are run by self-selecting politicians. We don't draft people; it's not jury duty.

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

How's the blood-stream, my dear, invaluable little woman? How's the blood-stream?"..."It's quite comfortable, sir...I think, sir, thank yo

Adoptee rights are everyone's rights, and they deserve to be protected.

Those who think it is permissible to tell white lies soon grow color-blind.

Women never cease to impress and inspire me.

Make health care a right, not a privilege.

Jewelry and profuse ornaments are unmistakable evidences of vulgarity.

Moments are born and moments die. For new experiences to come to life, old ones need to wither away.

I thought my mountain was coming this morning. It was near to speaking when suddenly it shifted, sulked, and returned to smallness. It has eluded me again and sits there, puny and dull. Why?

Anytime you can muster the fury to actually write in the face of the impossibility of writing, that's an achievement.

We live in an age where... Christian bashing is a popular indoor sport; and films mocking Jesus Christ are considered avant-garde.