Multi-Choice question: My dishwasher is: efficient; hilarious.

I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.

How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks gray.

I wear dark sunglasses when I want my head to look more like a limousine.

The clothes make the man. The children working in sweatshops make the clothes. Therefore, the children working in sweatshops make the man.

A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just give me the candy.

Earrings are the same as sneezes: Two is okay, but ten in a row is annoying. If you have two then, God bless you.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.

A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.

When you have a fat friend there are no see-saws, only catapults.

Curing cancer affects good cells in short run too but makes a life flourish in long term. Curing corruption affects good people in short run too but makes a nation flourish in long term.

No money can buy back the moment that is gone

I'd rather be the one making mistakes than the one laughing at someone making mistakes, for that laughing person is a wimp." ~ Denise Mansfield Bradberry.

Words to me were magic. You could say a word and it could conjure up all kinds of images or feelings or a chilly sensation or whatever. It was amazing to me that words had this power.

Peace is not the product of a victory or a command. It has no finishing line, no final deadline, no fixed definition of achievement. Peace is a never-ending process, the work of many decisions.

I could easily blast so much keef night and day I become a bouhali; a real-gone crazy, a holy untouchable madman unto whom everything is permitted, nothing is true.

'Son of Saul' film is extremely emotional; you're watching people walk in, you're watching people die. It centers around a child that goes into the ovens but survives the gassing.

My heart's in really great shape thanks to spinning classes.

Life is messy; it's not linear, it's not logical, and the book reflects that.

Why do I not seek some real good; one which I could feel, not one which I could display?