Michael Jackson is what happens when you keep fixin' it until it's broke!

You're basically killing each other to see who's got the better imaginary friend.

The only difference between the women I've dated and Charles Manson is that Manson has the decency to look like a nut case when you first meet him.

In life your dreams may not come true, but sooner or later one of your nightmares will.

Today, I bought a pastrami sandwich: $13.75. Walked back out in the street - genuine Rolex watch: six bucks.

Fifty per cent of all marriages end in divorce. But look at the bright side: the other 50 per cent end in death.

Live each day as if it were the last day of your life because, so far, it is.

The way I see life, it's like we're all flying on the Hindenburg, why fight over the window seats?

I always look for a woman who has a tattoo. I see a woman with a tattoo, and I'm thinking, okay, here's a gal who's capable of making a decision she'll regret in the future.

Success is like toilet paper, it only seems important when you don't have it.

Say whatever you want. But the United States has a kickass military and really good bullshit marketing people. If this country was a person it would be a used car salesman with a flamethrower.

Blessings always come in the silence of learning at the hand of God

Meditation is the simplest process through which you can create harmony between the body, mind, spirit, and nature.

I'm rambling again. Wandering off the point. But this is the true story of my wasted life...

The special quality of hell is to see everything clearly down to the last detail.

Pain indolence sterility endless ennui have also their lesson for you.

I'm a body builder, but I don't use weights. I use snacks. It's kind of a different building process.

Our focus reflects our love and admiration for you. . . . We want you to live lives of spiritual maturity and fulfillment, free of unrealistic comparisons.

In an Italian household, there were two figures for me growing up - you had the Pope and you had Frank Sinatra, and, of course, Tony Bennett. And not necessarily in that order.

Recognition is powerful, as long as it's authentic and specific. Whatever their level on the inverted pyramid, employees wants to feel needed and valued.

A lot of people expect to see the same type of character that they see on the field off the field, and that throws them for a loop.