Marriage entitles women to the protection of a strong man who will steady the stepladder while they paint the kitchen ceiling.

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

Think before you speak. Read before you think.

My favorite animal is steak.

The conversational overachiever is someone whose grasp exceeds his reach. This is possible but not attractive.

A hobby is, of course, an abomination, as are all consuming interests and passions that do not lead directly to large, personal gain.

As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.

Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.

There are two modes of transport in Los Angeles: car and ambulance. Visitors who wish to remain inconspicuous are advised to choose the latter

I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.

Are you all right?''How do I look?''Um… You have raven hair, brown eyes and bronzed skin if you didn’t know, and you’re… human.

My eyes are open and I’m not seeing a thing because I am so lost inside.

I know that I have had friends who would never have vexed or betrayed me, if they had walked on all fours.

When we eat vegetarian foods, we needn't worry about what kind of disease our food died from; this makes a joyful meal!

I don't mind not having recognition. If it happens, fine, but it doesn't bother me that it's not there.

That's my favorite food group: donut. I love the donut.

Save what you can toward the emergency and life happens fund. But don't worry yourself sick at the slow growth. The point is it's growing even it's just one dollar at at time.

It's hard to see your own face without a mirror.

That nation is proudest and noblest and most exalted which has the greatest number of really great men.

speculation is carried on in safety, but, when it comes to action, fear causes failure.