Ive got a lot of friends there and there is stuff to do but as much as I dislike LA I really like living and working in New York City.

I love doing stuff with Todd Barry and Jon Benjamin. We give the stage to good bands and funny people.

Occasionally I'll watch Fox News for as long as I can tolerate it, or CNN. I'll watch until I get infuriated, but you got to know what they're talking about and what they're not talking about.

I like pot, I enjoy pot, I like to smoke it. But, the one thing I don't like about pot is the subculture it's spawned. I think it's embarrassing and really juvenile and uncreative

You cannot win a War on Terrorism. It's like having a war on jealousy.

Sketches have characters, exits, entrances and are vastly different.

We should just get somebody from the left and the right and they should all throw bumper stickers at each other and the first one to cover the other one wins.

I hate bumper stickers, you can't sum anything up. All you do is paint yourself in some caricaturist corner.

The Bible is the funniest book I have ever read. It's so funny! Right in the first six pages, it's funny!

The South has more of a disproportionate amount of irony on T-shirts than any other region in the country.

I went to a bunch of marches in New York and Washington, and you know I believe in the cause, but to march with those people takes a lot of compromise on my end.

It's like she wears an "I'm-always-happy" mask. I used to play along.

The best musicians answer something in you when you don't even know the question.

I buy some art but I don't like to talk about it.

All I knew was that I would die if he sent me away. He shrugged. You can cut a man’s heart out with a shrug, did you know that?

I love going to work. I love being on-set everyday. It feeds me; it's exciting.

Obamacare is a disaster. It's too expensive. It's horrible health care. It doesn't cover what you have to cover. It's a disaster.

I love dogs because they're so adaptable.

Carnegie Hall was real fabulous, but you know, it ain't as big as the Grand Ole Opry.

There is no way that we can predict the weather six months ahead beyond giving the seasonal average.

You get trapped by stories. Though I've got this reputation for being out of control, it's not true, it just happens to be a more interesting story than the truth.