It's not as if ten years ago, we were like, 'I wish I could take low quality photos of my dessert.'

The appetizer is just an excuse for an extra meal. Let's see, I will start with the eighty buffalo wings.

Yeah the appetizer, that's the food we eat before we have our food...No no you're thinking of dessert, that's food we eat after we have our food.

You wanna know how good bacon is? To improve other food, they wrap it in bacon.

Whenever you correct someone's grammar just remember that nobody likes you.

I talk kinda slow, especially for the Northeast, so it was a way to beat [would-be hecklers] to the punch.

My favorite vegetable is the marshmallow.

The only advantage to wearing glasses is that you can do that dramatic removal.

Anyone know if the shuttles to Hell will have Wifi? Asking for a friend.

One of the benefits of eating salad is that you can eat tons of it and never be satisfied.

In the end, the type of parent you are is going to be something that you carry with you. ... Having multiple kids, it's been a gift in a way. It's keeping the priorities straighter.

Philosophers can debate the meaning of life, but you need a Lord who can declare the meaning of life.

Only what is below you tries to pull you down.

True wisdom often comes from the experience of failure—not from success.

At the door is at the door. Beware, there are wolves.

You can’t improve what you won’t face and own.

Love, free as air, at sight of human ties, Spreads his light wings, and in a moment flies.

Nursing is great for so many reasons, but there is one reason that means more than any poll results, amount of money, or job security: Nurses make a difference.

At a time when we must seek to rebuild trust between law enforcement and the local community, I am deeply concerned that the deployment of military equipment and vehicles sends a conflicting message.

I find it hard to understand why Scorsese has never called. You know, given the natural menace I bring to the screen.

Look for knowledge not in books but in things themselves.