I'm the guy to call. Look at the resume. I have kids of my own. I have dogs.

Are we just pretending to be unhappy so that we can add drama to our lives, so that we seem more substantial?

Television in the last few years has been where all the great writers are going. TV now is what indie film used to be.

Nothing seems to matter but ourselves. That's not how I was brought up. I don't recognize the country I live in anymore.

I think we have the attention span of a gnat. You know, with cell phones and Twitter.

We're all capable of anything as human beings. Any emotion, any action. We really are.

Working with Jim Carrey is an absolute gas. I have never laughed so hard for so long. Had he been on-board for the sequel of Dumb & Dumber, I would've jumped on, with no hesitation.

Comedy is hard to do. All the cliches about it are true.

I was haunted by trainers going "Up, up, up, get up." You find yourself picking your head up and then realizing, They aren't talking to me.

I think Michigan keeps you sane and on an even keel through the ups and downs. In Michigan, I do fireworks, shovel snow and live life.

You can't rewrite nothing, but you can rewrite 90 pages of sh*t. Now you've got your sh*t on the page, you can go work.

When many voices are speaking at once, listen to the one most quiet and gentle. That’s the one worth listening to. ~ Miranda* ~

Trust not tomorrow! Whatever you are planning, today is the best day to act!

It's strange, isn't it. You stand in the middle of a library and go 'aaaaagghhhh' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.

Always have Faith. Always have Hope.

Of all mad faiths maddest is the faith that we can get rid of faith.

Learning how to relive again on life's terms sure doesn't do much for your confidence. You have to kind of walk in faith that the next step is going to be just a little bit better than the last step.

Oh my god... Kerry is boring even when Bush is reading him.

...you can't play any defense if the other team is on the foul line.

Donald Trump connected with the American public because they wanted to be like him. They aspired to be just like him. They wanted to see all of his affluence, and he let them see it.

It's fun when you're winning and performing well, but it's also hard because now you get older, you got responsibilities.