I'd hate to imply that it's your civic duty to see The House I Live In, but guess what it is.

To me this is not yelling. I am not yelling. I'm just passionate about my opinions and I want to tell you all of them before you start talking again.

Haven't you noticed that every time the government f-ks up McDonald's has a new sandwich?

Only an adult with dying dreams can appreciate how awesome it is to have a dog.

God's everywhere, but I gotta go down (to church) to see him? Really? And he's mad at me down there, and I owe you money?

Let's go to Brunch. What a great idea! Why would you want to sleep in on a Sunday when you can go pay $18 for eggs? Now, you're thinking.

Surround yourself with positive people. Also, be a positive person. Root for people. Somebody else's success is not your failure.

Never do today what you can put off till tomorrow. Delay may give clearer light as to what is best to be done.

My favorite kind of humor is basically, if it was happening to you, it wouldn't be funny, but to observe it, it's hilarious.

Nothing worse than when a 6 acts like a 10.

I live my life as I deem appropriate and fitting; I offer no apologies, no explanations.

Nothing can contain the limitless spirit of a boundless heart.

Heaven will be heaven only if my wife is there.

Good people suddenly don't turn bad.

I absolutely want to have a career where you make'em laugh and make'em cry. It's all theater.

I married first, won the Oscar before Olivia (sister Olivia de Havilland) did, and if I die first, she'll undoubtedly be livid because I beat her to it!

Your mission: Be so busy loving your life you have no time for hate, regret or fear.

I didn't take lessons, and I don't know my scales.

Genius attracts more hate than love and more disrespect than respect; at least for the first few hundred years.

Our wish is that...[there be] maintained that state of property, equal or unequal, which results to every man from his own industry or that of his fathers.