Everyone has a family tree; the Dawsons have one, it's a weeping willow.

I went to my doctor and asked for something for persistent wind. He gave me a kite.

I took the wife's family out for tea biscuits. They weren't too happy about having to give blood though.

I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, six should be enough.'

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well. I was amazed; I never knew they worked.

I went to the doctor last week. I said: 'Can I have some sleeping pills for the wife?' He said: 'Why?' I said: 'She's woke up.

I toyed with the idea of playing Ravel's 'Pavane pour une infante defunte' but I couldn't remember if it's a tune or Latin prescription for piles.

My mother-in-law has come round to our house at Christmas seven years running. This year we're having a change. We're going to let her in.

My lad chewed and swallowed a dictionary. We gave him Epsom salts - but we can't get a word out of him.

A square egg in a dish of lentils won't make a marrow bend with the wind, nor will it make rhubarb grow up the milkmaid's leg.

I don't mind what the critics say, so long as I get some reaction. The worst thing is to be ignored.

The Sandman is rising."It'd been the only thing Coll had said before delirium had taken him again.The Sandman. Rising.

I'm sure there are directors who don't like to work with actors and don't know how to be sensitive to actors.

I think it would be better if nobody owned anything, but they didn't starve. Had enough paint and enough pianos and everything else.

Stand up like a mountain; have faith like a rock; love like an avalanche

You can't help but change a little bit, but on the inside I'm still completely the same person.

Living on the Gulf Coast, we often have to go through dangerous situations, whether you're a child, an adult or a senior citizen.

I think that zinc white has a property of scaling and cracking.

Choice by choice, moment by moment, I build the necklace of my day, stringing together the choices that form artful living.

I see Igby as my first movie as an adult, and it's a big deal for me because I really, really like the film.

Your life is the one place you have to spend yourself fully - wild - generous, drastic in an unrationed profligacy of self.