Do they allow tipping on the boat? - Yes, sir. Have you got two fives? - Oh, yes, sir. Then you won't need the ten cents I was going to give you.

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.

If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.

Prosperity is no just scale

We don't want someone who will get 98 percent of the vote. We want someone who will get 51 percent of the vote.

If there was a simple ethic for the band, it was that we want to be able to do whatever we want to do.

My Friend is that one whom I can associate with my choicest thought.

A long disease seems to be a halting place between life and death, that death itself may be a comfort to those who die and to those who are left behind.

I have always believed. I grew up, you know, my parents were a good Christian people. They showed us love in the home.

Self is a construct, a feeling, an identity that is internal and can neither be given nor taken away by others. We develop and nurture that identity by embracing inter-dependence.

They write them long because they can't write them short.

The sea does not contain all the pearls, the earth does not enclose all the treasures, and the flint-stone does not inclose all the diamonds, since the head of man encloses wisdom.

Someday death will take us to another star.