Computers operate on simple principles that can be easily understood by anybody with some common sense, a little imagination, and an IQ of 750.

You should definitely visit the Louvre, a world-famous art museum where you can view, at close range, the backs of thousands of other tourists trying to see the Mona Lisa.

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes.

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.

Like this quote if you believe you're a Patriot!

Rules of society are nothing one's conscience is the umpire.

Once I wanted total happiness - now I will settle for a little less pain.

We all have the right to call each other names. Rudeness is a deeply held constitutional value.

My inner world seems largely to consist of three rotating emotions: embarrassment, rage, and tension. Sometimes I feel excited, but I think that's just positive tension.

I listen to too many people. I'm only going to listen to my gut for the rest of my life.

My mother always used to say, 'There is no path to peace. Peace is the path.

We were not republicans or democrats during Katrina. We truly were all Americans, and Trent Lott came through for me.

I love making music so its important for me to keep doing that even if the schedule is busy.

One of the greatest gifts you can give your husband is your own wholeness.