And my only rule being if when I wake in the morning I'm looking forward to the things that I have to do that day, then I'm on the right track.

I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.

How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks gray.

I wear dark sunglasses when I want my head to look more like a limousine.

The clothes make the man. The children working in sweatshops make the clothes. Therefore, the children working in sweatshops make the man.

A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just give me the candy.

Earrings are the same as sneezes: Two is okay, but ten in a row is annoying. If you have two then, God bless you.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.

A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.

When you have a fat friend there are no see-saws, only catapults.

I need you both to trust me, " Vincent said. "I don't mean that I would like you to trust me. I mean that I need you to trust me.

The actor's popularity is evanescent applauded today forgotten tomorrow.

If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.

The younger generation is vibrant with a new psychology; the new spirit is awake in the masses . . . Each generation . . . will have its creed.

People who laugh together generally don't kill each other.

Understanding the materials I work with... gives me a deeper understanding of my place. And it's helped me make sense of the changes that are happening to me as I grow older.

No satisfaction based upon self-deception is solid.

The glamour Of childish days is upon me, my manhood is cast Down in the flood of remembrance.

I'm not going to watch two TV shows with vaginas in them unless somebody tells me why they're different!

Jeremy Corbyn had shown a catastrophic failure of leadership and must step down to make way for someone with the backbone to confront racism and anti-Semitism.