You ever talk about a movie with someone that read the book? They're always so condescending. 'Ah, the book was much better than the movie.' Oh really? What I enjoyed about the movie: no reading.

The appetizer is just an excuse for an extra meal. Let's see, I will start with the eighty buffalo wings.

Yeah the appetizer, that's the food we eat before we have our food...No no you're thinking of dessert, that's food we eat after we have our food.

You wanna know how good bacon is? To improve other food, they wrap it in bacon.

Whenever you correct someone's grammar just remember that nobody likes you.

I talk kinda slow, especially for the Northeast, so it was a way to beat [would-be hecklers] to the punch.

My favorite vegetable is the marshmallow.

The only advantage to wearing glasses is that you can do that dramatic removal.

Anyone know if the shuttles to Hell will have Wifi? Asking for a friend.

One of the benefits of eating salad is that you can eat tons of it and never be satisfied.

In the end, the type of parent you are is going to be something that you carry with you. ... Having multiple kids, it's been a gift in a way. It's keeping the priorities straighter.

We do not fight to tear down but to build up.

As a magician you will miss the hundred percent of the applause if you don't perform.

When we hide discrimination under the guise of 'religious freedom, ' we make a mockery of human rights.

For my own part, I would rather excel in knowledge of the highest secrets of philosophy than in arms.

You know most of the food that Americans hold so dear - things like hamburgers and hot dogs - were road food, but even before they were road food, they were peasant food.

We are lost, she and I, unseen and not seeing, unheard and not hearing, unknown by others.

When we ask God to 'bring an end to our enemies,' we should be thinking about Iran, those evil ones who threaten Israel.

Maturity is the ability to joyfully live in an imperfect world.

The difference between me and David Haye is that I want to be a fighter, he hates it, but he has to fight, remember that.

Countries have lost their culture because what they wanted was money. Money became the running theme in every country and culture was sacrificed.