We've got a lot of experience of not having any experience

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

But I am not going to live for ever. And the more I know it, the more amazed I am by being here at all.

Patriotism is an indispensable weapon in the defense of civilization against barbarism.

Make that money run like honey on your tongue.

It is easier to die for a cause than to live for it.

The mission of men there seems to be, like so many busy demons, to drive the forest all out of the country, from every solitary beaver swamp and mountain-side, as soon as possible.

My definition of genius is not being that person the actual human is a genius, but it's a person that just allows God to work through them.

We invent our technologies and then we turn around and use our technologies to reinvent ourselves as individuals, communities and cultures.

I'm a New Yorker, so I have the sort of tough vein that's naturally bred into me. In general, I'm a nice person, and that seems to surprise people sometimes.

Obama was gonna get everything he wanted in the first year because, if anybody opposed it, they were gonna be accused of being a racist, or bigot, or who knows what.

No man hates him at whom he can laugh.