This idea that people have to love and understand each other is absurd. It's not human nature.

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

Think before you speak. Read before you think.

My favorite animal is steak.

The conversational overachiever is someone whose grasp exceeds his reach. This is possible but not attractive.

A hobby is, of course, an abomination, as are all consuming interests and passions that do not lead directly to large, personal gain.

As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.

Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.

There are two modes of transport in Los Angeles: car and ambulance. Visitors who wish to remain inconspicuous are advised to choose the latter

I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.

To share a hiding place, physical or psychological, is as intimate as love.

Just because people don't meet you doesn't mean they're not out there breaking their asses trying to get around.

As in an organ from one blast of wind To many a row of pipes the soundboard breathes.

The study of what is excellent is food for the mind and body.

I think that in today's world the right to privacy and freedom of the press are set on a collision course.

Good, bad, or indifferent - it doesn't matter, just work.

I'm not going to spend two years of my life on something that I'm not excited about.

Character, I am sure, lies in the genes.

A professorship of Theology should have no place in our institution [the University of Virginia]