The precise location of heaven on earth has never been established but it may very well be right here

The trouble with born-again Christians is that they are an even bigger pain the second time around.

A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew.

Cockroaches and socialites are the only things that can stay up all night and eat anything.

I hope I go to Heaven, and when I do, I'm going to do what every San Franciscan does when he gets there. He looks around and says, 'It ain't bad, but it ain't San Francisco.'

I sometimes worry about my short attention span, but not for long.

Isn't it nice that people who prefer Los Angeles to San Francisco live there?

A city is not gauged by its length and width, but by the broadness of its vision and the height of its dreams.

San Franciscans have a bond of self-satisfaction bordering on smugness.

It is better to have loved and lost, but only if you have a good attorney.

There are a thousand viewpoints in the viewtiful city.

you giver of light.you lover of love.you beautifulbeautifulhuman beingyou.

She had a very inconvenient heart. It always insisted on feeling things ever so deeply.

There is usually an inverse proportion between how much something is on your mind and how much it´s getting done!

Computer programs are the most complex things that humans make.

I think a loaded weapon aboard an airplane, whether its in the cargo section or in your overhead baggage, is a security issue.

Sometimes all you need to live one more day is a good reason to stick around.

I'm having the time of my life figuring out this next move.

I'm surprized Hitler didn't round up the toupee people.

Zen is the only religion in the world that teaches sudden enlightenment. It says that enlightenment takes no time, it can happen in a single, split second.