Larry David Quotes

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If you tell the truth about how you're feeling, it becomes funny.

If you tell the truth about how you're feeling, it becomes funny.

Larry David

Women love a self-confident bald man.

Larry David

I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at all. I was interested in being a great comedian.

I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at all. I was interested in being a great comedian.

Larry David

There's also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny.

There's also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny.

Larry David

Most people are completely unaware of their breath. They violate your space, they have no idea that they have halitosis.

Most people are completely unaware of their breath. They violate your space, they have no idea that they have halitosis.

Larry David

When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom.

When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom.

Larry David

A date is an experience you have with another person that makes you appreciate being alone.

A date is an experience you have with another person that makes you appreciate being alone.

Larry David

I gave a funny speech at my wife's birthday party, and I'm thinking, 'Hey, I've still got it.'

I gave a funny speech at my wife's birthday party, and I'm thinking, 'Hey, I've still got it.'

Larry David

I'd like to start a family but you have to have a date first.

I'd like to start a family but you have to have a date first.

Larry David

It began to dawn on me that perhaps my country needed me more at home than overseas.

It began to dawn on me that perhaps my country needed me more at home than overseas.

Larry David

I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good spot picked out.

I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good spot picked out.

Larry David

You have to discover when you're inadequate to be funny and you don't know you're inadequate when you're a kid.

You have to discover when you're inadequate to be funny and you don't know you're inadequate when you're a kid.

Larry David

Golf and dating don't mix.

Larry David

The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so it's the best of both worlds. There's a lot to be said for it.

The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so it's the best of both worlds. There's a lot to be said for it.

Larry David