The best thing to do is to behave in a manner befitting one's age. If you are sixteen and under try not to go bald.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.

You rely too much on brain. The brain is the most overrated organ.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.

Honey! Bring down a copy of my will - and an eraser!

To you, I'm an atheist.To God, I'm the loyal opposition.

God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.

Thank Life For Happening, Thank Every Twist And Turn, There Is A Reason For Every Single Thing, There Is A Reason For Every Worry And Concern.

Relationships are complicated no matter what style of parenting you choose.

Perfect is boring: Beauty is irregular.

The relationship between Israel and the United States is a bond of - it's just a very powerful bond. It was, it is, and will be and will continue to be.

There is always something to be thankful for. If you can't pay your bills, you can be thankful you are not one of your creditors.

The experience of love and the experience of death destroy the illusion of our self-sufficiency. The two are closely connected, and to become fully human we must experience both of them.

Kindness is not about instant gratification. More often, it's akin to a low-risk investment that appreciates steadily over time.

It's not that I'm Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes now, but I've got my priorities in order.

Sons or fathers, poor men or rich men, sacred or secular: all are homosexual in their worship of everything phallic.

The leader has a clear idea of what he wants to do professionally and personally, and the strength to persist in the face of setbacks, even failures