President Herbert Hoover returned his salary to the government. His idea caught on, and now we're all doing it.

When you finally go back to your old home, you find it wasn't the old home you missed but your childhood.

Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all.

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.

A man can please his wife with a box of candy, surprise her with a bouquet of flowers, and make her suspicious with a gold bracelet.

A man commented to his lunch companion: My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire. You're lucky, sighed the companion. My wife dreams that in the daytime.

Nothing is as frustrating as arguing with someone who knows what he's talking about.

When you feel neglected, think of the female salmon, who lays 3,000,000 eggs but no one remembers her on Mother's Day.

It's not the hours you put in your work that counts, it's the work you put in the hours.

Success has a simple formula: do your best, and people may like it.

Computers are like bikinis. They save people a lot of guesswork.

If there is a void in your life then you will never fill it with cash!

I can't give you the sunset, but I can give you the night.

What is a butterfly? At best He's but a caterpiller drest. The gaudy Fop's his picture just.

Magnus, I wish I had the nerve to wear the kind of pants you do.

Let your critics make you humble, and your enemies make you wise. Learn from every stumble but let nothing keep you down, for you were born to rise!

I enjoy directing. I don't know whether it's improving or not, but it's certainly evolving in different directions.

In music, you feel a connection to the voice and think about the person behind it. In art that's secondary.

I don't like to Google myself. I try and avoid it whenever I can.

I love her but I wouldn't marry her if she [Kate Moss] was the last woman on earth.

Human nature is such that monogamy is a really hard thing to achieve.