Poetic talent is really easy to fake when thy sentences doth no f-king sense make.

Quotes are for dumb people who can't think of something intelligent to say on their own.

Once a week, I like to slip into a deep existential depression where I lose all my sense of oneness and self-worth.

I love you just the way you are but you don't see you like I do. You shouldn't try so hard to be perfect. Trust me, perfect should try to be you.

I saw a giraffe with a short neck That was sad Or a deer

If Jesus can walk on water, can he swim on land?

Laughter is the best medicine, y'know, besides medicine.

Squaring numbers are just like women. If they're under thirteen, just do them in your head.

If I had a dime for every time a homeless guy asked me for change, I'd still say no.

I stopped and I thought, 'What would Jesus do?' So I didn't exist.

Maybe life on earth could be heaven, doesn't just the thought of it make it worth a try?

I hate to admit this, but some days hearing about other people's problems actually cheers me up.

Beware of too much taste as it leads to sterility.

The most honest of men is the one who thinks and acts best, but the most powerful is the one who writes and speaks best.

Most Americans are born drunk, and really require a little wine or beer to sober them.

But the great Master said, "I see No best in kind, but in degree; I gave a various gift to each, To charm, to strengthen, and to teach".

Every time I fail I assume I will be a stronger person for it.

We've done several concerts to promote literacy.. anywhere from children in Africa to children in St. George. It's definitely something that we have always been supportive of.

No, painting is not interior decoration. It is an instrument of war for attack and defense against the enemy.

The Republican Party and the conservative movement cannot unify around a single proposition, and the Democrats easily do. They have total contempt for us.

What we now call the browser is whatever defines the web. What fits in the browser is the World Wide Web and a number of trivial standards to handle that so that the content comes.