PANDEMONIUM, n. Literally, the Place of All the Demons. Most of them have escaped into politics and finance, and the place is now used as a lecture hall by the Audible Reformer.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

I think mixed women from interracial marriages are beautiful, and for many reasons, all of them good.

If you love somebody, go get them. Deal with the mess later. They are important more than anything.... You don't know what tomorrow will bring.......... and sometimes tomorrow never come ........

Shut up!Leave him alone! He cant understand. He cant help what he is ... but for God's sake, have some respect! He's a human being!

Love encompasses so much, reaches so far, and heals so deeply, that any attempt to describe it, no matter how poetic, only dilutes it.

If people don’t sleep with me I just rape them. Because right is not given but taken.

Understand the power of asking.

If God were small enough to be understood, He would not be big enough to be worshipped.

Im not revolted by Washington.

Any business or industry that pays equal rewards to its goof-off and its eager beavers sooner or later will find itself with more goof-offs than eager beavers.

I don't believe in delivering four times a year and then also delivering things that are not season appropriate.