ORPHAN, n. A living person whom death has deprived of the power of filial ingratitude . . .

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

Silence is an ornament for women.

Let me show you how it's done... Loser!

I get to meet fantastic people, and I get to go through so many emotions. For me, I have a craving for that. When I'm acting, I feel great. It's not to be famous.

We are going to save our Second Amendment.

Law and arbitrary power are at eternal enmity.

A lot of the films now are more focused on the visuals than on the actors. I think all directors should go to drama school.

Everyone has his own imagination of God. It is best if everyone is left to his own imagination.

I was such a geek in school.

When people have been traumatized, they are stuck in paralysis-the immobility reaction or abrupt explosions of rage.

Every present occasion will catch the senses of the vain man; and with that bridle and saddle you may ride him.