Just believe everything I tell you, and it will all be very, very simple.""Ah, well, I'm not sure I believe that.

He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.

My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre and that I am therefore excused from saving universes.

We can't win against obsession. They care, we don't. They win.

The Guide says there is an art to flying", said Ford, "or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Time is the worst place, so to speak, to get lost in, as Arthur Dent could testify, having been lost in both time and space a good deal. At least being lost in space kept you busy.

The bowler approached the wicket at a lope, a trot, and then a run. He suddenly exploded in a flurry of arms and legs, out of which flew a ball.

and then I decided I was a lemon for a couple of weeks.

Zaphod did not want to tangle with them and, deciding that just as discretion is the better part of valor, so was cowardice is the better part of discretion, he valiantly hid himself in a closet.

He was alone with his thoughts. They were extremely unpleasant thoughts and he would rather have had a chaperon.

He would insult the Universe. That is, he would insult everybody in it. Individually, personally, one by one, and (this was the thing he really decided to grit his teeth over) in alphabetical order.

Each age selects its own geniuses from the past to suit its own needs. It's always been that way.

Do you know the hallmark of the second-rater? It's resentment of another man's achievement.

Entrepreneurship is the launching of surprises.

Intelligence is not all that important in the exercise of power, and is often, in point of fact, useless.

This fitness thing is blown out of proportion. What am I going to do on a treadmill - smoke a cigarette and drink a diet Coke?

I just got my work visa to shoot American Horror Story, and my official status is "alien with extraordinary abilities."

True love does not pay attention to the evil it suffers. It rejoices in doing good.

Consider those whom you call your enemies and figure out what they should call you.

We need creative people working with broadcasters, making smart content to inspire people to be geniuses.