In theory, taxes should be like shopping. What I buy is government services. What I pay are my taxes.

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

Soon, the pain will be over!

I think I have a right to live my life the way I like.

I don't think it makes any sense for an individual to invest in common stocks unless they know the company, work at the company, and so on.

When I finally got a management position, I found out how hard it is to lead and manage people.

We are not going to let Donald Trump bankrupt America the way he bankrupted his casinos.

It’s okay. I’m used to people not wanting me at their parties.” I pushed to my feet. The stars seemed to twirl a bit with the movement. “No big deal.

You better wake up before it's too late, or they'll be doing your makeup down at the coroner's place.

The very young and the very old often saw what others could not. Or would not.

At twilight, nature is not without loveliness, though perhaps its chief use is to illustrate quotations from the poets.

I'm not possessive, I'm caring... Once you realize a person doesn't want that much care, you automatically back off.