If someone like this were to like me, to like my comedy, and to like the way I conduct myself professionally, it would mean that I suck as a person.

I want to experience as many different tastes, sights, emotions, conflicts, and cultures as possible, so that I can expand the canvas of my memory and enrich my comedy.

Zombies can't believe the energy we waste on nonfood pursuits.

People will find transformation and transcendence in a McDonald's hash brown if it's all they've got.

hobos' (a slang term that combines the words 'hope' and 'bowl of beans given to me for free by a woman who then initiated intercourse')

Use your imagination not to scare you to death but to inspire you to live.

Never expect appreciation for your hardwork. Make sure you are doing the right thing and just continue..

I don't take roles that are 'just another role.' I'm interested in learning more about myself and about humanity. So it should change you by the time it's done.

Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were. But without it we go nowhere.

One of the big things I miss about New York is not my friends so much; it's Shake Shack, the burger place. I miss Shake Shack.

At length I fell asleep, with the volume in my hand; and never slept so sound before

The artist is the only lover; he alone has the pure vision of beauty, and love is the vision of the soul when it is permitted to gaze upon immortal beauty.

Faith looks back and draws courage; hope looks ahead, and keeps desire alive.

Pity cost nothing and ain't worth nothing.

Ceremony leads her bigots forth, prepared to fight for shadows of no worth. While truths, on which eternal things depend, can hardly find a single friend.