If one more person tells me this is just like old times, I swear I'll jump out the window.

Tragedy is a close-up; comedy, a long shot.

A comedian does funny things. A good comedian does things funny.

Silence is of the gods; only monkeys chatter.

Charlie Chaplin and I would have a friendly contest: Who could do the feature film with the least subtitles?

Like everyone else, I like to be with a happy crowd.

They say pantomime's a lost art. It's never been a lost art and never will be, because it's too natural to do.

No man can be a genius in slapshoes and a flat hat.

All my life I have been happiest when the folks watching me said to each other, 'Look at the poor dope, wilya?

And if there is sweeter music this side of heaven I haven't heard it.

I don't act, anyway. The stuff is all injected as we go along. My pictures are made without script or written directions of any kind

I know he wasn’t perfect…But he did the best impression of it I’ve ever seen.

To love me, my family does not need to understand me.

The wrongs of a Husband or Master are not reproached.

I was thinking about picking up kayaking, but I didn't want anyone to think I had herpes.

I am myself for a living. I don't animate a character.

Only the #‎ gospel can do two seemingly contradictory things: destroy pride and increase courage.

Having other comedians complimenting my work is the biggest accolade that I can get.

There is nothing that compares to an unexpected round of applause.

I am a great artist and I know it, it is because I am that I have been able to endure so much suffering.

The Heart that is not in love will fail the test.