I love the earth. If you ask me it's the greatest planet in the world.

God works in mysterious ways but at least he works, he's never on welfare in a mysterious way.

Folks, I don't trust children. They're here to replace us.

Internet users, that blue screen of death you were looking at this morning? That's the sky. If you're still confused, look it up on Wikipedia tomorrow.

It would be a very short pint. It would be gummy bears and matzah, and be called Chewy Jewy.

I'm a satirist, so I've got boxing gloves on if the person is worthy of satire. But I'm not an assassin.

This is America. We must defend the principles symbolized by Lady Liberty - unless she's on the pill, in which case, she is a giant green tramp.

Don't cry over spilled milk. By this time tomorrow, it'll be free yogurt.

An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough.

Contrary to what people may say, there's no upper limit to stupidity.

What does Karl Marx put on his pasta? Communist Manipesto!

If you are truly able to walk in the shoes of Christ, the very label of religion called Christianity would disappear from the face of earth.

Those who are attached only to the result of their effort will not have any chance to appreciate it, because the result will never come.

Failure is not our only punishment for laziness: there is also the success of others.

You get involved with a character after spending a long time waiting, and this demands a lot of energy and concentration.

Is there any wonder why we are in such big trouble? Any question why the people don't trust their government anymore, and demand a change?

In the theatre, the actor is in total control. The director wasn't in the house last night, the designer wasn't there, the author's dead. It's just us and the audience.

Your best as an artist is to create something that resonates for you.

The music in a film like this is as critical as anything because Kong is mute. He doesn't talk.

The Tonkawa killed him it make my heart hot. I want my people follow after white way. Some white people do that, too.

Most people don't realize turkeys are friendly, they're social, they're loyal, they have emotions.