I left the Midwest thinking I didn't fit in. But when I got to New York, I realized how truly Midwestern I was.

The appetizer is just an excuse for an extra meal. Let's see, I will start with the eighty buffalo wings.

Yeah the appetizer, that's the food we eat before we have our food...No no you're thinking of dessert, that's food we eat after we have our food.

You wanna know how good bacon is? To improve other food, they wrap it in bacon.

Whenever you correct someone's grammar just remember that nobody likes you.

I talk kinda slow, especially for the Northeast, so it was a way to beat [would-be hecklers] to the punch.

My favorite vegetable is the marshmallow.

The only advantage to wearing glasses is that you can do that dramatic removal.

Anyone know if the shuttles to Hell will have Wifi? Asking for a friend.

One of the benefits of eating salad is that you can eat tons of it and never be satisfied.

In the end, the type of parent you are is going to be something that you carry with you. ... Having multiple kids, it's been a gift in a way. It's keeping the priorities straighter.

What is your calling? Find it and ardently live it.

He's for you and wants to help you be the person He created you to be.

If people are suffering then they must look within themselves. ... Happiness is not something ready-made [Buddha] can give you. It comes from your own actions.

Prayer guards hearts and minds and causes God to bring peace out of chaos

I like being a cog in a wheel. I like being a small aspect of a much bigger thing, and I think my interest in that takes the pressure of myself.

Illegal downloading, digital cheating, and cutting and pasting other people's stuff may be easy, but that doesn't make those activities right.

I couldn't remember ever having seen a young man with such power, so many facets of expression, so much sheer invention as an actor.

Who is an artist? I say we take a title. No one gives it to us. We make our lives.

There are many upright and faithful who live all the commandments and whose lives and prayers keep the world from destruction.

Life would be so much easier if fictional boys were real.