I am opposed to heart attacks and cancer and strokes the way I am opposed to sin.

If you think research is expensive, try disease!

People want the answer to cancer, and they're not going to get it without spending money, because money is frozen energy that unfreezes itself when you pay people to work.

Without money nothing gets done.

I couldn't cut up a frog, and I certainly couldn't perform surgery. I'm better at making it possible for other people.

No one needs Independence. We all just need tea and air conditioners.

That which never attains a state of non-principle [non-truth] is known as the principle.

It's a skill that people are born with. Either you're a focuser or you're a multitasky person. I am a full-focus person.

... women are the pivot round which the world turns.

Maybe pretty women were always funny but only now decided to go into comedy.

Allen's Law of Civilization: It is better for civilization to be going down the drain than to be coming up it.

Thanks to my father, I didn't have to face the tough side of life. Probably that's why I always chose love over money.

I think you really have to tap into your sense of humor in order to survive.

When there's an important tournament going on, I try and stay in a bubble. It's easy that way because then you don't have to worry about anything else.

To a man the greatest blessing is individual liberty; to a dog it is the last word in despair.