Funny things tend not to happen to me. I am not a natural comic. I need to think about things a lot before I can be even remotely amusing.

To Be Successful You Don't Need Beautiful Face And Heroic Body, What You Need is Skillful Mind And Ability To Perform

You're about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.

I'm not a naturally funny man. I find that I can only be funny, if I become someone else.

The older you get, the more you realise how happenstance... has helped to determine your path through life.

But I always feel that whatever I do, I could do better. I suppose it is perfectionism.

I want to express myself in a different way. I have a performing inclination.

I can be reasonably funny and light-hearted when I'm in the company of good friends, but I'm not a jokesmith. I tend to be quite serious.

Your services might be as useful as a barbershop on the steps of a guillotine.

Art is something that nobody laughs at and nobody makes any money out of is the attitude, which I would dispute.

The path of my life is strewn with cow pats from the devil's own satanic herd!

We can discover the capacity of the mind to be aware, to love, to begin again

Fainting is for preteen girls and those really weird goats. I do not faint!

Carve out and claim the time to care for yourself and kindle your own fire.

Isn't it splendid to think of all the things there are to find out about? It just makes me feel glad to be alive- it's such an interesting world.

Stories that are real, that create you, rather than be created by you, are powerful.

There is nothing worse that a thirteen-year-old boy. You're embarrassed by your parents, and you're trying to find your independance because, deep inside, you are so dependent on your mom.

It isn't so much that hard times are coming; the change observed is mostly soft times going.

At the end of our life our questions are simple: Did I live fully? Did I love well?

It is the man that makes the motive, and not the motive the man.

There's sort of an open offer to work with a guy in Los Angeles who does big band and orchestra arrangements who was at least an acquaintance to Les Baxter before he passed away.