Dogs act exactly the way we would act if we had no shame.

Dogs are us, only innocent.

If you can't live without me, why aren't you dead already?

There is a microscopically thin line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth.

Infidelity is such a pretty word, so light and delicate. Whereas the act itself is dark and thick with guilt, betrayal, confusion, pain, and (okay) sometimes enormous pleasure.

Never judge someone by who he's in love with; judge him by his friends. People fall in love with the most appalling people.

A person who uses party as a verb is a person who will walk into a shop and walk out wearing a rubber jumpsuit.

Friends are the twenty-first-century version of extended families.

we know that our world is corrupt and diseased but we're tired of being cynical and feeling helpless. What the hell, tilt at a windmill.

Show me a woman who is prouder of her clean kitchen than of her collection of lingerie and I'll show you a woman with enlarged pores.

The only women who don't believe that sexual harassment is a real problem in this country are women who have never been in the workplace.

In the Book of Life, The answers aren't in the back.

It has been said that life only gives us what we can handle. But this is not the case. Life often kills us, that's the truth. But that's how phoenixes are born.

Everybody learns from their own mistakes.The wise learn from mistakes others make.

Not simply one of the virtues but the form of every virtue at the testing point which means at the point of highest reality.

We will always make sure player health and safety is our No. 1 priority in the NFL.

Mainstream media tend to just mouth the conventional wisdom, to see everything through the filter of right and left.

Any time you try to be edgy just for the sake of being edgy, that's the worst way.

Petition me no petitions, sir, to-day; Let other hours be set apart for business. To-day it is our pleasure to be drunk; And this our queen shall be as drunk as we.

Books don't change people; paragraphs do, Sometimes even sentences.