Did you know that five out of three people have trouble with fractions.

I never eat in a restaurant that's over a hundred feet off the ground and won't stand still.

Many Texas barbecue fanatics have a strong belief in the beneficial properties of accumulated grease.

The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.

The shelf life of the average trade book is somewhere between milk and yogurt.

As far as I'm concerned, 'whom' is a word that was invented to make everyone sound like a butler.

Perhaps we've time to have a look at the Number Thirty-One bus queue before we turn in.

I'm in favor of liberalizing immigration because of the effect it would have on restaurants. I'd let just about everybody in except the English.

Every good idea sooner or later degenerates into hard work.

I never did very well in math - I could never seem to persuade the teacher that I hadn't meant my answers literally.

Math was always my bad subject. I couldn't convince my teachers that many of my answers were meant ironically.

The ugliest government is the one which is spreading fear to its own people! The finest government is the one which encourages its own people to criticize the government harshly.

Political success in Athens seemed to depend on having a party, and there seemed now to be no party with whom an honorable man could connect himself.

Beware of those who promise a quick and easy way, for much ease brings many difficulties.

Growing up, I was never the kind of girl to dream about wedding dresses and pretty houses.

Being alone when one's belief is firm, is not to be alone.

In the moral sphere, every act of justice or charity involves putting ourselves in the other person's place and thus transcending our own competitive particularity.

I consider my greatest accomplishment to be lifelong celibacy.

To a critic, no explanation will do. To a fan, no explanation is needed.

Be like the flower, turn your faces to the sun.

We're killers, all of us: We kill our lives, our past selves, the things that mattered. We bury them under slogans and excuses.