Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status.

Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.

Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.

Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder.

Don't believe in miracles - depend on them.

An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.

Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before Father Time takes it away.

When in doubt or danger, run in circles, scream and shout.

A man doesn't know what he knows until he knows what he doesn't know.

There are two kinds of failures: those who thought and never did, and those who did and never thought

Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.

Happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length.

She lacks the indefinable charm of weakness. It is the feet of clay that make the gold of the image precious.

Ottawa is a city where nobody lives though some of us may die there.

But I have always said that it's important we must make sure that justice is at all time be maintained.

I had a dream that Connie Chung is doing a newscast about my death and they show a clip from Soap.

It seems to me that oftentimes in young relationships once there's a problem of some significance then it's almost like they're both racing for the dumper buzzer.

We make progress only when people are willing to speak about what their lives are like and what they care about. We make it possible for others to understand our perspective.

In philosophy, the principles are more interesting than the examples. In literature, the examples are more interesting than the principles.

When someone loves you, there's nothing they won't do for you. When they stop loving you, there's nothing they will.

For some reason focusing on destruction and mortality is more poetically exciting to me than hope and love.