Better a lively old epigram than a deadly new one.

A wise woman puts a grain of sugar into everything she says to a man, and takes a grain of salt with everything he says to her.

Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor.

Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning hand springs or eating with chopsticks. It looks easy until you try it.

A man never knows how to say goodbye; a woman never knows when to say it.

A bride at her second marriage does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.

A good woman inspires a man, a brilliant woman interests him, a beautiful woman fascinates him, but a sympathetic woman gets him.

Wedding: the point at which a man stops toasting a woman and begins roasting her.

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is.

The genius of stable societies is that they achieve stability without stagnation, repetition without monotony, conformity with originality, obedience with liberty.

The one surefire key to victory as a Christian in this fallen world is to be filled with the Holy Spirit—that is, to be completely submitted to and empowered by him.

It's amazing the clarity that comes with psychotic jealousy.

Every article I wrote in those days, every speech I made, is full of pleading for the recognition of lead poisoning as a real and serious medical problem.

You don't have to run around world proving you're lovable.

The great joke is that a realist is an optimistic pessimist. That's very witty. Whether it's truthful or not, that I don't know.

Every arrangement in life carried with it the sadness, the sentimental shadow, of its not being something else, but only itself.

I can't help what I sound like. What I sound like is what i am. You know? I cannot be anything other that what I am.

The hand check has always been a part of pro basketball.

Specificity of time and place drop away and one starts to think about the picture, as much as what it is of.