Youth looks forward, for nothing is behind! Age backward, for nothing is before.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

..there is more to life than just pleasure. We want to achieve our happiness and not just experience it.

If one dies to inspire, believe it or not he's already inspiring one's self

If I have a hit, then I hope the people who like the hit song go out and buy my album so they can hear it all.

Not all who discharge their debts of gratitude should flatter themselves that they are grateful.

Matt Hardy's quicker than a hiccup.

I promised to tell you how one falls in love.

I have outlived that care that curries public favour or dreads the public frown…let the hand of law strike me down if it will, but I ask that my story be heard and considered.

Shakespeare will never be made by the study of Shakespeare.

I was always trying to be leaner and thinner to fit the standard and the mold.

The protection of a man's person is more sacred than the protection of his property.