Your toaster’s a puff.

St John had always been a fan of the RS Turbo, mainly due to the colour coded rear spoiler and air vents in the bonnet, which distinguished it from the more common and less powerful XR3i.

Had the facial plumage been of a paler hue it would have looked like a pile of horse crap on a winter’s day.

Her protestations were drowned out by the sound of Gordon Honeycomb barfing up aftershock into the kitchenette sink.

You little prick. It's a whelk...it's a...it's a...dead whelk!

A huge meringue with polio who drives everywhere in a beautifully restored Hillman Imp.

The best stories are the ones with the unexpected plot twists that no one would have guessed, even the writer.

My new life was unstable and unsure, but each new day was shot through with new possibility.

The theater was my first training ground. It taught me discipline, dedication and appreciation of hard work.

Protectionism is the institutionalization of economic failure.

First it is necessary to stand on your own two feet. But the minute a man finds himself in that position, the next thing he should do is reach out his arms.

As far as the style, I was fascinated by surrealism.

I'm not one of those crazy collectors - I don't have a hundred watches. Only five or six. But I do like to wear a nice watch, especially if we're on the road and I'm wearing a nice suit.

I try to exercise in nature, and I try to play golf once a month. The last time I played golf with my wife, however, she got better scores than me, which became an additional source of stress.

But give me more credit than that. Someone else may have dealt the hand, but I picked it up off the table, I played every card, and I had my reasons.

The thing is I'm very interested in bad taste, as anyone who's ever seen me perform or had dinner with me would know.