You don't want to be glib; you want to treat every story respectfully.

Last year people won more than one billion dollars playing poker. And casinos made twenty-seven billion just by being around those people.

Don't judge me. I made a lot of money.

Kids do have to learn that life is a humiliating charade of endless disappointment and tragedy ultimately culminating in pain, decay, and death. My parents used to sing me to sleep with that one.

I'm capable of living in the moment. And I'm especially capable of living in the moment of sitting on my sofa and watching other people's moments.

I dislike Ted Cruz as much as the next everyone. But that's no reason to be rude to Ted's loving wife and possible hostage.

There's a danger zone if you take yourself too seriously. It's a terrible trap to fall into. I think it's the death of comedy.

It's like you can't even go on the radio anymore and condemn a whole subset of people to hell without getting some blowback.

I continue to be very shy. I think a lot of actors and performers are really weird, shy people working it out onstage. I don't know why that is.

I grew up an only child, so I was so much more adult. My eldest daughter is 10, and I was so much more of an adult than she is. She just doesn't care for the real world. She's not interested.

You have to be willing to ask questions that almost no one else would ask.

We are told in Scripture that there will be signs pointing toward the return of the Lord.I believe that we see those signs in the world today. I believe that the coming of the Lord is near.

Our ex-wifes always harbour secrets about us that make them irresistable. Until, of course, we remember who we are and what we did and why we are not married anymore.

Eyes as dark as her heart and as empty as her soul

The only thing that makes battle psychologically tolerable is the brotherhood among soldiers. You need each other to get by.

Nothing motivates a great employee more than a mission that's so important that it supersedes everyone's personal ambition.

There is a strong feeling in the Middle West that the artist is not pulling his own weight no matter how hard he may work, that the other people are doing the real stuff.

I have lived enough to know great things will unfold for me externally only if I allow them to unfold for me internally.

I am one who eats breakfast gazing at morning glories.

Great work is always shunned at first.

You know, I hate to give advice because my life has been so odd that almost nothing that's happened to me can apply.