To a man, marriage means giving up four out of five of the chiffonier drawers; to a woman, giving up four out of five of her opinions.

A wise woman puts a grain of sugar into everything she says to a man, and takes a grain of salt with everything he says to her.

Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor.

Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning hand springs or eating with chopsticks. It looks easy until you try it.

A man never knows how to say goodbye; a woman never knows when to say it.

A bride at her second marriage does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.

A good woman inspires a man, a brilliant woman interests him, a beautiful woman fascinates him, but a sympathetic woman gets him.

Wedding: the point at which a man stops toasting a woman and begins roasting her.

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is.

If I feel physically as if the top of my head were taken off, I know that is poetry.

Once your character is poured with vigor and your attitude radiates confidence, there is no power in any external force to have any form of authority over you.

May God give comfort to the suffering souls.

We can only be enlightened to the meaning of wise words only and only if life have put and made us requiring them.

There are many ways to roll with the punches. Still, it’s probably best to avoid people who punch you.

...I stood there, inexpressibly grateful that my life, for all its terrors, is so filled with moments of grace.

She looked confused. She looked off-balance. That’s a technique I employ to get dates, and it always works.

I'm happy people look at me as a role model.

If I wanted to write, I had to be willing to develop a kind of concentration found mostly in people awaiting execution. I had to learn technique and surrender my ignorance.

If a person's religious ideas correspond not with your own, love him nevertheless