The thing about stories is you have to pick the ones that last.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Don't take giant leap to make your life better. Just enjoy every minute of your life

The ages live in history through their anachronisms.

If I say that you are mine, then I am yours.

To understand the nature of the people one must be a prince, and to understand the nature of the prince, one must be of the people.

All motion is relative. Maybe it's you who've moved away by standing still.

The world can never be in the state of right order, strong government, and good influence unless London is truly and literally established as its capital.

Young actors are serious about their work and don't take any time out from it. I'm very serious about my work; there are probably only two films I've done where I had a really good time.

I know, in my heart of hearts, I don't do things for money.

Even if Osama bin Laden is caught tomorrow, it is five years too late. To capture him now I don't think makes us any safer.

If you have a talented family, you should be shot if you don't use them.