The older you get, the funnier fart jokes are.

I like things that are immature and offbeat and bizarre. Random jokes. Weird stuff. And stupid. Stupid is the highest compliment a person can pay to me.

If had a penny for every strange look I've gotten from strangers on the street I'd have about 10 to 15 dollars, which is a lot when you're dealing with pennies.

It's just cool to be involved in something that's that big and joyous and meant to make people feel happy.

I'm a tearless clown. If I were to get a tattoo, it would be the two masks, and they would be both smiling.

I didn't realize how much people liked to bash SNL until I was on. I've always just liked it, and I've always watched it and been into it.

I do a lot of laughing at my own self in life, so I think I come at things with a pretty easygoing view.

I'm a comedian, and I decided I wanted to be a comedian when I was eight years old watching old Saturday Night Live episodes. I never decided to be a rapper because I'm not a rapper.

If I was any more on edge, I'd be Bono.

As long as I get to be doing what I love, which is making comedy and that kind of thing, I feel lucky that I get to.

People will tell me, "Oh, my kid watches your show on their iPad, over and over again until they memorize." And I'm like, "Wow, I was that kid watching other shows. That's the coolest!"

Love at first sight is easy to understand it's when two people have been looking at each other for a lifetime that it becomes a miracle.

When I was the director of Central Intelligence in the early '90s, I tried to get the Air Force to partner with us in building drones. And they didn't want to, because they had no pilots.

My mom gave me a Chanel dress when I was younger. I felt special. I think anybody feels special in Chanel.

Acting is mostly about listening. If you just focus in on what the other person is saying, acting takes care of itself to quite a large extent.

Being comedic is a skill, because there is a fine line where the context is important. And being dramatic is just being honest and real in that moment.

The liabilities are always 100 percent good. It's the assets you have to worry about.

I'm not sure what we're running from. Nobody. Or the future. Fate. Growing up. Getting old. Picking up the pieces. As if running we won't have to get on with our lives.

We lived our lives as if life was forever. To live one's life without a sense of time is to squander it.

For before this I was born once a boy, and a maiden, and a plant, and a bird, and a darting fish in the sea.

He was a bit like a corkscrew. Twisted, cold and sharp.