The last time I saw that crooked stupid smile on your face, I got-a-so mad, but then I realized...that crooked stupid smile is there all the time.

My daddy, or papa as Ilike to call him is always healthy. Sure, he had the herpes but he managed it very well!

Carlito likes to swap spit with men who don't want to be cool.

Haha, you lose! I got your delicious Subway sandwich Jerry 'stupid' Lawler!

Those are real bottomlines, because Santino Marella say it be so!

I make love to the beautiful Maria and you make love to your stick!

You're not even in a restaurant, but... you got served!

These people are like sheep, if you were to ask them, who would like hepatitis, they are all going to cheer.

Don't make him anger please. I don't like it when he's anger.

It doesn't matter what I said!

I'm Jerry Lawler, I make fun of women because I have no self-esteem.

As the state of mind, as the efficiency. Time is only a relative factor

Hopefully, we can learn from the 60s that we cannot afford to do our enemies work by destroying each other.

Oh, that I could dedicate my all to God. This is all the return I can make Him.

Spontaneous dates are the best.

I have the libido of a 15-year-old boy...

The test of a great golfer is his ability to recover from a bad start.

The Bernie Sanders phenomenon shows that it's not confined to Republicans. There is a general sentiment that America is on the wrong track.

The unchangeable can only be realised in silence. Once realised, it will deeply affect the changeable, itself remaining unaffected.

A sense of humor...is superior to any religion so far devised.

Politics cannot be a science, because in politics theory and practice cannot be separated, and the sciences depend upon their separation.