The best medicine I know for rheumatism is to thank the Lord that it ain't gout.

Laughter is the fireworks of the soul.

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.

Health is like money, we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it.

The miser and the glutton are two facetious buzzards: one hides his store, and the other stores his hide.

Never work before breakfast; if you have to work before breakfast, eat your breakfast first.

Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.

Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.

The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.

Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.

The happiest time in any man's life is when he is in red-hot pursuit of a dollar with a reasonable prospect of overtaking it.

Keep moving, no matter how slow you move, you will definitely arrive at your destination.

If they were there for you when you had nothing, they are the ones worth having now. If they only notice you because of what you have gained, are they worth having at all?

God gave burdens also shoulders.

For a time, at least, I was the most famous person in the entire world.

People are going so far as to kill themselves over the things that happen online.

As above, so below, as within, so without.

Why can't rappers just say nice things? Like I wanna take your clothes off and hang them up in the closet real nice.

A lot of the issues I faced in junior high was what got me into animation. It was easier to sit on the side and draw cartoons than to engage with people.

I think it's important to have a good sense of humor and joke around with your kids. That's what I do a lot.

I don't want to run for governor, but I don't think anyone should put public service out of the question because that's not what a good citizen does.