The advantage of being able to identify sin is that you can go out and do it, and enjoy it.

I prefer someone who burns the flag and then wraps themselves up in the Constitution over someone who burns the Constitution and then wraps themselves up in the flag.

On the whole, I prefer not to be lectured on patriotism by those who keep offshore maildrops in order to avoid paying their taxes.

What we have here, fellow citizens, is a crassly egocentric, raving twit.

It's like, duh. Just when you thought there wasn't a dime's worth of difference between the two parties, the Republicans go and prove you're wrong.

It is possible to read the history of this country as one long struggle to extend the liberties established in our Constitution to everyone in America.

Satire is traditionally the weapon of the powerless against the powerful. I only aim at the powerful. When satire is aimed at the powerless, it is not only cruel -- it's vulgar.

If you ever get to the place where injustice doesn't bother you, you're dead.

One thing that corporations do not do is give out money out of the goodness of their hearts.

I know: "Guns Don't Kill People." But I suspect that they have something to do with it. If you point your finger at someone and say, "Bang, bang, you're dead," not much actually happens.

How the American right managed to convince itself that the programs to alleviate poverty are responsible for the consequences of poverty will someday be studied as a notorious mass illusion.

Julia was as happy as Betsy was, almost. One nice thing about Julia was that she rejoiced in other people's luck.

After twelve centuries, a little hope had come into the world - and then came an illiterate prince to ride roughshod over it with a barbarian horde and...

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children.

Be thankful not only that you are an individual but also that others are different. The world needs all kinds, but it also needs to respect and use that individuality.

I'm a big believer in overcoming and achieving and doing things and not feeling sorry for yourself.

To cultivate sympathy you must be among living creatures, and thinking about them; and to cultivate admiration, you must be among beautiful things and looking at them.

There's a hazy smile on her lips that won't go away, and her hair is a mess. It's like a brushfire filled with casualties.

The main reason we understand what we're doing is because we're the individuals doing it. One of the things that surprises me is that all the songs are about me, and it's cool that people care.

Death belongs to life as birth does The walk is in the raising of the foot as in the laying of it down

The greatest shackles we bear in thislife are those forged by our own fears