In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children.

We call ourselves a free nation, and yet we let ourselves be told what cabs we can and can't take by a man at a hotel door, simply because he has a drum major's uniform on.

Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?

The free-lance writer is a man who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps.

You might think that after thousands of years of coming up too soon and getting frozen, the crocus family would have had a little sense knocked into it.

Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed be doing at that moment.

Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.

A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.

Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other.

There is no such place as Budapest. Perhaps you are thinking of Bucharest, and there is no such place as Bucharest, either.

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.

Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods." (1794)]

The taller you stand, the more possibilities you see.

Caroline, do you value your neck?""Yes, I'm rather fond of it. Why?""Because if you don't shut up, I'm going to wring it.

When you blame others, you are affirming that you have no power, and your existence is only a reaction to the power of others.

In every out-thrust headland in every curving beach in every grain of sand there is the story of the earth.

To Howard Goodkin, for the immense work he did in his short life so Hispanic children can stand tall and proud.

[On women's role in the home:] Every wife, mother and housekeeper feels at present that there is some screw loose in the household situation.

I can remember years ago sitting on my bed and suddenly thinking, "I am God."

I equate ego with trying to figure everything out instead of going with the flow. That closes your heart and your mind to the person or situation that's right in front of you, and you miss so much.

Performing in a live theater is absolutely unbeatable. It is something I have done my entire life and have a gift, it seems, for sharing thoughts live.