Swimming is a confusing sport, because sometimes you do it for fun, and other times you do it to not die. And when I'm swimming, sometimes I'm not sure which one it is.

I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.

How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks gray.

I wear dark sunglasses when I want my head to look more like a limousine.

The clothes make the man. The children working in sweatshops make the clothes. Therefore, the children working in sweatshops make the man.

A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just give me the candy.

Earrings are the same as sneezes: Two is okay, but ten in a row is annoying. If you have two then, God bless you.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.

A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.

When you have a fat friend there are no see-saws, only catapults.

All the bravery that lines our lives, in the ordinary moments adds up to an extraordinary, successful life.

I'm a real Suzy Homemaker.

Problems cannot all be solved, for, as they are solved, new aspects are continually revealed: the historian opens the way, he does not close it.

I feel all those human beings to be pernicious who can no longer oppose what they love: they thereby ruin the best things and people.

Art is about trying to find the good in people, and making the world a more compassionate place.

I'm having a great life, and I want to go on having one.

To regret the past, to hope in the future, and never to be satisfied with the present: that is what I spend my whole life doing

I love Jennifer Hudson! She is so lovely on screen. She is so buoyant and youthful off screen as much as on.

You could start at a path leading nowhere more fantastic than from your own front steps to the sidewalk, and from there you could go… well, anywhere at all.

Of course climate change is real.