People say it's lonely at the top, but I sure like the view.

I don't have a tuxedo that fits anymore because my chest and my biceps are too big.

I'm tired of pretending like I'm not bitching, a total fricking rock star from Mars...

Boom, crush. Night, losers. Winning, duh.

I've got magic. I've got poetry at my fingertips.

I still don't have all the answers. I'm more interested in what I can do next than what I did last.

The best way to not get your heart broken, is pretending you don't have one.

It's quite fitting that Slash is getting a star on the very street Axl Rose will one day be sleeping on.

I am on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen. It's not available. If you try it once, you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body.

My success rate is 100 percent. Do the math.

I'm still alive, which is pretty cool.

Human nature is never satisfied.

Change is not merely necessary to life - it is life.

If you want greater prosperity in your life, start forming a vacuum to receive it.

Neither machines, nor the commodities made by them, rise in real value, but all commodities made by machines fall, and fall in proportion to their durability.

I don't go on vacation. I don't really need vacation.

Remorse is violent dyspepsia of the mind.

These problems are real, and you can't turn off real life. So I won't try. Instead, I'll give you a set of tools to help you deal with real life.

All holy piety in public, and all peeled grapes and self-indulgence in private.

Every indication of wisdom, taken from the effect, is equally an indication of power to execute what wisdom planned.