PIE, n. An advance agent of the reaper whose name is Indigestion.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

It's only after the change is fully formed that you can see what's happened.

Act as if there is no chance of failure.

Do you know what it's like to be condemned to love?

Neil said to me once that in times of desperation, you have to force yourself to make a decision.It's your choice, he said. Us or them. So choose.

Conscience is the manifestation of our divine nature, the absolute truthfulness that we all have inside, that resides beyond the instinctive desire to survive.

It's a different sort of love taht puts up with illness. Old love.

I often wonder if we could not solve the world's problems on a similar basis of harmony.

Most human beings, though in varying degrees, desire to control, not only their own lives but also the lives of others

I don't have to explain anything to anybody.

I moved to L.A. because that's where they point cameras at you. And that's what I'd like them to do.