Living well and ripping your enemy's still-beating heart out with your bare hands is the best revenge.

A Madagascar Hissing Roach chasing Jerry Lewis. That would be a really neat treat.

Once you put yourself in the hands of the government, you could end up in Utah.

Life is one big minefield, and the only place that isn't a minefield is the place they make the mines.

You only live once and, usually, not even then.

I don’t think television will ever be perfected until the viewer can press a button and cause whoever is on the screen’s head to explode.

Making people laugh is the lowest form of comedy.

Licorice is the liver of candy.

If there were a Mount Rushmore of American humor, Terry Southern would be the mountain they'd carve it from

The transformation scene, where man is becoming insect and insect has become at least man and beyond that - a flying, godlike, shimmering, diaphanous, beautiful creature.

Surely there must be a better gift God could have given us than life?

Why should we look to the past in order to prepare for the future? Because there is nowhere else to look.

Know that your heart can be deployed to wherever the Lord sends you in prayer

The impulse of modern art was this desire to destroy beauty.

But peace, too, is a living thing and like all life it must wax and wane, accommodate, withstand trials, and undergo changes.

Sometimes simple things are the most difficult things to achieve.

Be empty. Be still. Just watch everything come and go. This is the way of Nature.

I have been writing for 50 years and readers still read my first book from when I was in the Marine Corps.

How could you be a Great Man if history brought you no Great Events, or brought you to them at the wrong time, too young, too old?

For it is an essential difference between capitalist and socialist production that under capitalism men provide for themselves, while under Socialism they are provided for.

With how sad steps, O moon, thou climb'st the skies! How silently, and with how wan a face!