Living one's life with unguarded vulnerability is one of the keys to happiness. It's also one of the keys to getting mugged.

If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.

Life is what you make of it, unless you have tourette's, in which case much becomes involuntary.

If space suits looked less like marshmallows, I'd be more interested in going to the moon.

Cupcakes are the tattooed brunette chick of the baked goods world.

Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.

Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.

Happiness is a carnival game. It's never as easy as it looks, but the dumb ones always seem to be walking around with a big stuffed animal.

It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.

Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.

Insecurity is like herpes. It's not going anywhere. May as well learn to laugh at it.

the answers you look for are within you and around you

Water doesn't know where it's going to flow, it just flows.

Most of us focus so much on 'capturing' the moment that we don't realize we keep losing it for the next which we will lose next:-)

The dead should not linger.

There are so many errors and misstatements in that list that I won't even begin to name them. Obama was right about one thing, though - Islam has always been a part of America's story.

I want to give you some love, I want to give you some good good lovin

This is like the town council just hired a new marshal to clean up the town, I guarantee you, if I stay here long enough, they'll get rid of me, too.

We're over-delivering value against other choices I think consumers can get.

Life is a zero sum game.

I've always said that an art critic can put aside politics around art.